13 Things Mentally Strong Women Don't Do
意志力坚强的女性不会做的13件事
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2019-05-25 12:44
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You build mental muscles the same way you build physical muscles—exercise. Good habits (like lifting weights) will help you grow stronger. But giving up counterproductive bad habits (like eating too much junk food) is key if you really want to make progress.

增强意志力的方法和强身健体你通过锻炼塑造肌肉方法方式是相同的——都是通过练习。优良的习惯(比如举重)可以使变得强壮。但如果你真的想要进步有所提升的话,改掉那些坏习惯(比如大量食用垃圾食品)是取得进展的关键。

While the exercises that build mental muscle are the same for both men and women, gender can play a role when it comes to the counterproductive bad habits that can keep you stuck. It only takes one or two bad habits to hold you back from reaching your greatest potential.

尽管对于男性和女性来说锻炼意志力的方法是相同的,但性别差异对那些让人使你停滞不前的坏习惯也会有影响。只要一两个坏习惯就能阻止你充分发挥自己的才能,你最大的潜能就不能很好地发挥出来

My newest book, 13 Things Mentally Strong Women Don't Do, outlines the bad habits that women are more likely to adopt. Cultural expectations, societal pressures, and the subtle differences in the way we raise girls are just a few of the factors that encourage women to engage in these unhealthy habits.

我最新出版的那本《意志力坚强的女性不会做的13件事》例举了一些女性更容易染上的坏习惯。文化期望、社会压力以及我们在抚养女孩时的那些微妙差异,都会成为女性养成这些坏习惯的催化剂

Recognizing your unhealthy habits is the first step in creating positive change. Here are 13 things mentally strong women don't do:

意识到自己的坏习惯是做出积极改变的第一步。以下是意志力坚强的女性不会做的13件事:

1. They Don't Compare Themselves With Other People

  1. 她们不会与人攀比比较他人和自身的差异

Whether you're looking at Instagram photos of a celebrity's vacation, or you're hearing your friend talk about her latest raise, comparing yourself with others is tempting. But every minute you spend comparing your life with someone else's life is 60 seconds you aren't focusing on your goals.

不论你是刷Instagram看明星度假时的照片,还是在听朋友谈论她最近的加薪,比较自身和他人的差异这件事都很有诱惑力。但是你每花一分钟去与他人攀比比较自身和他人的生活差异,这60秒你没有专注于你自己的目标。 

2. They Don't Insist on Perfection

2.她们不执着于完美

Perfectionism has a cruel ironic twist; it will cause you to experience such high levels of stress that your performance will actually become impaired. Establish high expectations for yourself, but don't set the bar impossibly high.

完美主义有着残酷而讽刺的扭曲性;它会导致你积累过多的压力,以至于影响你的表现。给自己设定一个相对高的期望,但也不要太高。

3. They Don't See Vulnerability as a Weakness

3.她们不将脆弱视为自己的弱点

Your game face definitely serves a purpose—it shows people you're serious. But asking for help, acknowledging your weaknesses, and admitting you don't have all the answers aren't signs of weakness.

摆出一副心机重重的样子在竞争时摆出那副表情肯定是有目的的——它表明你是认真的。但是寻求帮助,承认自己的弱点,承认自己并非无所不知绝不是软弱的表现。

4. They Don't Let Self-Doubt Stop Them From Reaching Their Goals

4.她们不会让自我怀疑成为实现人生目标途中的绊脚石

Your brain will try to convince you that you're not good enough, capable enough, or smart enough. But don't believe everything you think. Your brain will underestimate you.

你的大脑会试图说服你,让你认为自己不够优秀、能力不足,或是不够聪明。但是千万别相信你的这些想法。你的大脑是会低估你的。

5. They Don't Overthink Everything

5.她们不会想太多

Rehashing the same things over and over again and worrying about everything that could go wrong wastes precious time and mental energy. And it will take a toll on your psychological well-being. Commit to problem solving and productive action, rather than ruminating and overthinking.

一遍又一遍地纠结重复同样的事情,担心所有可能出现差错的事情,从而浪费了宝贵的时间和精力。这会损害你的心理健康。你应该致力于解决问题和采取富有成效的行动,而不是反复思考和过度思考。

6. They Don't Shy Away From Tough Challenges

6.她们面对艰巨的挑战时不会退缩

Whether it's a promotion to a leadership position or it's an uncomfortable conversation you need to have with a friend, avoiding tough challenges will keep you stuck. Face your fears one small step at a time and you'll gain confidence in yourself.

无论是晋升到领导岗位,还是与朋友进行一次令人不适的交谈,回避棘手的挑战都会使你陷入困境。面对恐惧,每次迈出一小步,你就会对自己越来越有信心。

7. They Don't Fear Breaking the Rules

7.她们不惧怕打破陈规

From a young age, many girls are taught the importance of being polite and well-mannered. But it's the rule-breakers who change the world.

对于年轻人来说,许多女孩儿被教育要彬彬有礼。但改变世界的往往是那些打破陈规的人。

8. They Don't Put Others Down to Lift Themselves Up

8.她们不踩着别人上位

It may be tempting to try to elevate your own status by pointing out someone else's flaws. But genuine cheerleaders are the ones who really succeed in life.

通过指出别人的缺点来达成晋升的目的可能很有诱惑力。但真正的领导者是那些在生活中真正成功的人。

9. They Don't Allow Others to Limit Their Potential

9.她们不会限制其他人发挥自己的潜力

Whether someone told you that you'd never amount to anything or you got turned down for a promotion, other people can limit your potential if you let them. Build the belief in yourself, and you won't let criticism or rejection stop you.

无论是有人告诉你,你将永远一事无成,还是你被升职拒之门外,如果你放任自流,别人就会限制你发挥自己的潜力。建立自己的信念,你不会让批评或拒绝阻止你。

10. They Don't Blame Themselves When Bad Things Happen

10.当坏事发生时,她们不会一味自责不责备自己

While it's important to accept personal responsibility when you make a mistake, toxic self-blame does more harm than good. Saying "I made a bad choice" is much more productive than thinking "I am a bad person."

当你犯错的时候,承担个人责任是 

11. They Don't Stay Silent

11.她们不缄口不言

From business meetings to social gatherings, studies show women don't get nearly as much airtime as men. Speak up and find your authentic voice so you can be heard. 

从商务会议到社交聚会,研究表明,女性的发言时间几乎与男性一样多。敢于发声,发出你真实的声音,这样他们才能听见你的想法。

12. They Don't Hesitate to Reinvent Themselves

12.她们毫不犹豫地重塑自己

As you mature, your personality, priorities, and values will shift and so should you. Whether you make a complete career shift at age 40 or you decide to embrace your spirituality at 60, reinventing yourself is key to personal growth.

随着你逐渐成熟,你的个性、优先事项和价值观都会发生变化,理应如此。无论你是在40岁时完成职业转型,还是在60岁时决定拥抱自己的灵魂,重塑自我都是个人成长的关键。

13. They Don't Fear Owning Their Success

13.她们不畏惧获得成功

Women are afraid of looking arrogant or too ambitious. Even when complimented, they're likely to pass the credit onto someone else or give an immediate compliment back. Practice giving a simple "thank you," and own your achievements.

女性害怕自己看起来傲慢或野心勃勃。即使受到称赞,她们也可能把功劳转移到别人身上,或者立即给予回报。练习说一句简单的“谢谢”,然后享有你自己的成就吧。

Build Your Mental Muscle

增强自己的意志力

Fortunately, everyone has the ability to build more mental muscle by changing the way they think, feel, and behave. And the best way to grow mentally stronger is to work smarter—not just harder—by giving up the unhealthy habits that are holding you back.

幸运的是,每个人都有能力通过改变自己的思维、感受和行为方式来增强意志力。要想在精神上变得更强大,最好的方法就是更机灵地工作,而不仅仅是更努力,你要放弃那些阻碍你前进的坏习惯。

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