7招教你提高情商
7 Simple Ways to Deepen Your Emotional Intelligence
1119字
2020-01-15 17:51
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火星译客

Emotional intelligence has become a topic at the forefront of human resources workshops, leadership groups, and corporate training sessions—and with good reason.

情商是人力资源工作室、领导小组、公司培训会的前沿性话题,这并非空穴来风。

Evidence shows that emotional intelligence plays a big role in workplace performance. Individuals with high emotional intelligence perform better and usually experience better psychological and physical well being. 

有证据表明,情商对于职场绩效起着至关重要的作用。  一个人情商越高,其心理状况和身体状况通常也会越好。

Emotional Intelligence Components

情商的构成

The concept of emotional intelligence was made popular by an author named Daniel Goleman. His 1996 bestseller, Emotional Intelligence, introduced it to the public. The idea was originally proposed by John Mayer and Peter Salovey in 1990.

情商的概念由一位名叫丹尼尔·戈尔曼(Daniel Goleman)的作家提出并流传开来的。 他1996年发表的畅销书《情商》将这个概念介绍给大众。 这个想法最初是由约翰·梅叶尔(John Mayer)和彼得·萨罗威(Peter Salovey)于1990年提出的。

The model of emotional intelligence proposed by Salovey and Mayer contains four parts:

萨罗威和梅叶尔提出的情商模型包含四个组成部分:

  1. Perceive emotions in oneself and others accurately;intel
  2. Use emotions to facilitate thinking;
  3. Understand emotions, emotional language, and the signals conveyed by emotion; and
  4. Manage emotions to attain specific goals.

1.准确地感知自己和他人的情绪的能力;
2.用情绪促进思考的能力; 
3.了解情绪、情绪语言和情绪所传达信号的能力;
4.管理情绪以实现特定目标的能力。

Studies have shown that emotional intelligence can be learned. It has become a billion-dollar industry, as training programs have proved very effective in helping people raise their emotional intelligence and perform at their best.

研究表明,情商是可以通过学习提高的。而且,研究表明,培训计划能够非常有效地帮助人们提高自己情商并达到最佳状态,因此情商培训已成为一个价值数十亿美元的行业。

But you don't need a formal training program to boost your own emotional intelligence.

但是,提升情商无需参加正式的培训班。

Here are seven simple ways to boost your emotional intelligence.

本文为您介绍几种简单方式提升自己的情商

1. Label your emotions.

1.为自己的情绪打标

People rarely like to talk about their feelings, despite the fact that our emotions affect every decision we make. Many people are much more comfortable saying things like "I had butterflies in my stomach" or a "lump in my throat" than what they are really feeling, which is sadness or anxiety.

尽管情绪会影响人们做出的每一个决定,但是人们很少喜欢谈论自己的感受。 许多人在说“我肚子翻江倒海的”或“喉咙中了”之类的话,实际上比他们真正的感觉(悲伤或焦虑)要舒服得多。

Practice labeling your emotions with real feeling words—frustrated, anxious, disappointed, etc. Check on yourself a few times a day, and pay attention to how you are feeling, even if you don't announce it out loud.

练习用表示情绪的词汇来(沮丧,焦虑,失望等)标记您的情绪。即使没有大声宣布你自己的情绪,也要每天检查几次,并注意自己的感受。

2. Consider how your emotions affect your judgment.

2.考虑一下你的情绪如何影响你的判断

Now that you know how you're feeling, take time to consider how these emotions are affecting your thoughts and behaviors. If you're sad, it may cause you to be afraid of rejection, and you may underestimate your chances of success.

通过第一个方法,你已经知道了自己的感受,接下来花点时间,考虑一下这些情绪如何影响您的思想和行为。如果感到难过,可能会导致你害怕对别人说不,并且可能低估了自己获得成功的机会。

On the other hand, if you're overly excited about an opportunity, you may overestimate your chances. This could lead to taking risks without examining the potential consequences or drawbacks.

另一方面,如果面对一个机会过于兴奋,你可能会高估自己的机会。这可能导致贸然行事,而不去考虑可能造成的后果或消极影响。

To make better decisions, you need to recognize how your emotions are affecting your judgment. In doing so, you will balance the outlook of your own logic and emotion, and thus be better equipped to make decisions.

为了是自己更好地做出决定,需要知道自身的情感如何影响自己的判断。这样,就可以在自己的逻辑和情感中间寻找到一个平衡点,从而更好地去做下一步决定。

3. Decide whether your feelings are a friend or an enemy.

3.确定情绪是天使还是魔鬼

Every emotion we experience has the power to be helpful or unhelpful at times. The same emotion can affect us in either a positive or negative way, depending on how we use it.

我们的每一个情绪既能产生积极作用,也能会造成负面影响。同样一种情绪既可能对我们产生积极影响,也可能为我们带来不良后果,这取决于我们如何驾驭它。

Once you determine what you are feeling at any moment, next consider whether that emotion is being a friend to you or an enemy at the time. Anger could be a friend when it helps you stand up for injustice. It could be an enemy, however, when you're entering a discussion with your boss.

一旦了解了自己当前处于什么情绪状态下,就该考虑自己当前的情绪会产生积极影响,还是造成负面效应。例如,见义勇为时,面对不义之举,愤怒是一剂强心针,具有积极作用;而当你和上司讨论问题时,问题便是你头上的达摩克利斯之剑。

Sadness can be helpful when it reminds you to honor a person you no longer have. But it could be an enemy when it gets in the way of your motivation in life.

当你面对已故之人,悲伤情绪能够提醒你,铭记这位已经逝去的先人。但是,一旦悲伤情绪进入生活,便会造成诸多负面影响。

If you realize that sadness is being an enemy, you must do what you can to regulate your emotions. Try to experiment with different coping strategies to help you do this. Maybe meditation for a few minutes can help you calm down. Afterward, even a simple activity like walking around the block might help you cheer up.

如果已经意识到悲伤正在对自己造成负面影响,就需要采取措施来管控自己的情绪了。尝试用不同的解决方案来预演一下,这有助于帮助你管控悲伤情绪。要想冷静下来,可以进行几分钟冥想。然后,在街道上溜达几圈这样的简单运动也能帮助你振作起来。

4. Be responsible for your own emotions.

4.为自己的情绪负责

Saying that your co-worker makes you feel bad about yourself, or blaming your boss for putting you in a bad mood, implies that you are letting other people control your emotions. Your ability to respond to your emotions involves your accepting full responsibility for them.

当你说同事会让您对自己感到难过,或者指责老板使您心情不好。这些迹象意味着你是在让别人控制自己的情绪。 应对自身情绪的能力其实就是学会完全接受自己的情绪,对自己的情绪全权负责。

Only you can choose how you decide to respond to your circumstances and to other people. Remember this any time you are tempted to think someone else is dragging you down emotionally. So rather than think, "He's making me mad," try something like, "I don't like what he's doing right now, and I'm getting mad."

面对环境因素或他人因素给你造成的影响,只有你自己能选择如何应对。当自己觉得别人影响了你的情绪时,时刻记住这一点:与其说“他要把我逼疯”这类的话,还不如说“我真不喜欢他现在做的事情,我快疯了”之类的话。

5. Notice other people's feelings.

5.关注他人感受

Your understanding of how other people are feeling is one of the key components to raising your emotional intelligence. Focusing on this will prevent you from interrupting someone you disagree with or jumping into an argument.

理解他人感受是提高情商的关键因素之一。专注于此有助于防止打断与自己存在分歧的人或引起争论。

Pay close attention to other people's emotional states. If you can recognize how someone is feeling, then you will better understand how that emotion is likely to influence that individual's perception and behavior.

密切关注他人的情绪。如果能察觉到他人感受,就能够更好地了解他人的情绪可能会给其思想和行为带来怎样的影响。

6. Limit your screen time.

6.减少使用电子产品的时间

Spending too much time on your digital devices will impair your relationships. In romantic relationshipsstudies have found that having a smartphone present while you're spending time with someone else can inhibit closeness and erode trust.

要是花太多时间使用电子产品,会对人际关系造成影响。研究发现,在恋爱过程中,与对方相处时手里拿着手机玩耍,不利于两人关系发展,还会造成不信任。

Too much screen time can also interfere with an individual's ability to read or understand emotions. And as you read earlier, this is one of the four critical components of emotional intelligence.

花太多时间使用电子产品也会对个人解读、理解情绪造成障碍。另外,之前也提到过,解读、理解情绪是情商四大组成部分之一。

2014 study published in Computers in Human Behavior found that preteens who spent five days at an outdoor camp without access to their digital devices greatly improved their ability to read other people's emotions. This improvement of understanding nonverbal emotions happened in just five days without their electronics.

2014年,《人类行为计算机》(Computers in Human Behavior)上发表了一篇论文,其研究发现,青春期孩子在户外营地度过了五天时间,期间不使用其携带的任何电子设备,他们阅读他人情感的能力都有极大提高。

So setting healthy limits on your technology would probably be a good idea. Don't have your phone out when you are talking face to face with people. Set aside time periods during the day when you won't use your phone—maybe the first hour after you wake up, lunch time, or before bed. 

因此,面对科技带来的便利,设置合理健康的使用时间不失为提高情商的可行之道。 与人面对面交谈时,请不要拿着手机。每天请留出一点时间不使用手机,可以在起床后的一小时,午餐时间期间,或者睡觉以前进行。

Doing a digital detox every now and then can really do you some good. A few days without your electronics will better equip you in your ability to read other people's emotions.

时不时远离电子设备确实可以为您带来一些好处。几天不使用电子设备会提高您解读、理解他人情绪的能力。

7. Reflect on your progress.

7.每日一省尔身

At the end of every day, reflect on your progress. Did you interact well with a frustrated co-worker? Acknowledge this of yourself.

一天快要结束了,想想今天有没有控制好情绪吧。同事情绪低落,有和他好好沟通吗?自己心里最有数。

But then also notice the areas in which you need to improve. Did you get defensive about some tough feedback, or did anxiety prevent you from talking to your boss? Be careful to learn from those mistakes, and do better in the future.

但是,也要注意到,哪些方面还有待提高。您是否对一些棘手的反馈意见做出了顶撞,你的焦虑是否影响了你和老板的沟通?对于这些错误,要小心翼翼吸取教训,并争取未来做得更好。

There is always room to sharpen your skills when it comes to emotional intelligence. Enrolling in a training program can help you if you're feeling stuck. And you can always read a book or hire a coach to help you boost your emotional intelligence even more.

当谈及情商时,情感技能总有方法去提高。如果觉得遇到瓶颈,可以参加一个情感技能培训课程。如果可以,甚至可以常常读书,或者雇佣情感导师,帮助你更好地提升情感技巧。

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